still numb

still waiting for my heart to catch up with reality and truth.

how long does it take for the news on the outside to reach the insides? but somehow God’s grace is still beside me….singing to me when i’m afraid of being alone in this thing…..

God, help me talk to You…….

favorite quotes of Grace from facebook….

one of the many things Grace would always do in class.
from making bubble stars, to folding origami, to those infmaous bracelets.
I asked her once what she did with all of the bracelets she made, and her answer was that she weaved them all into a magic carpet. =] (Quanglong T.)

Grace, it was an honour to serve you and love you. Sometimes I felt like you were the one that was discipling me instead. I miss you and your squishy hugs. I miss your half chuckles and late night talks. You were very much a walking testimony of the gospel. (Jane C.)

Grace, take a picture of the throne room and send it to me in a dream. Glorify His name! (Norman W.)

Hi, I love your profile picture Man, I bet you have your own beach in your back yard. (Victoria S.)

you better remember what i said. Save me good spot. Till then i will miss you but continue to love you. (Mark P.)

Hey Grace, I will never forget your never ending kindness. you were truly an inspiration to us all. (Josie C)

Hey Grace, I just want to let you know that I am thankful to be able to know you, to be able to see how much you grew since the day I met you in CASC Youth Group. I still remember you were so little and cute when I first met you, hahaha… I still …remember the day you first learned playing the guitar from Kevin Yu. I still remember the first day you led worship for Youth Group. I still remember the day I brought you to AAIV Kick-Off BBQ before school started and the day you told me you love AAIV and you want to commit to AAIV and serve there. Seeing how much you grew is probably one of the most encouraging things I have ever seen in my life. Grace, you are always my little sister in Christ and I will always love you and miss you. I am looking forward to see you in Heaven. I will continue to pray for Sunny, your mom, and your dad. Tell Jesus I said Hi and tell him that I will pray to him, repent to him and read His word daily. (Edmund C.)

hey gracie, i bet you’re having a great time up there :] i still have all the little origami things you made for me back in the 6th grade…haha. (and don’t worry, when i get up there too, you’ll never have to staple yourself to me ag…ain because i’ll be with you for…eternity. hahahaha) i’m so blessed to have had you in my life and continually challenging my faith. miss you, love you. (Vania H.)

I’ll see you later friend (Koske K.)

Hey Grace, remember we talked about the second coming of Jesus? How glorious it is going to be when we did our jobs here on earth and to meet God? You were so sure that Jesus was coming back in our life time… and I told you that then we will see Hi…m together. I guess you couldn’t wait little longer to see Him with me. That’s fine, I will see Jesus and you soon too! Let’s have a big reunion when I go up there, ok? You should have still waited for me tho…:( I Miss you Grace! (Stephen H.)

Hi Grace!!!! I just wanted to tell you how much I will miss you! Even passing by the bubble is hard since that was our usual study place. Our Thursday night study sessions after Large Group will be truly missed. I never got to tell you this, but …you were one of the main reasons I kept going to small group last year and aaiv in general. You are a great, kind, funny, and genuine person, and someone I truly look up to. You taught me so much in the year that I knew you. One day we will be partying together in Heaven! Rest in peace ♥ (David S.)

man, I bet u were dancing up and down for joy seeing all the different kinds of ppl from every fellowship and ppl from your classes that came together to pray for you, your family, and for each other the past few days. I know you’re in the BEST …hands. “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.
8Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear.” Then the angel said to me, “Write: ‘Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!’ ” ~Rev. 19:6-9 I’ll cya at The Wedding, Grace!!!(Sherry Lin)

apparently there’s a word limit on these things. lame (Peter L.)

Grace Yu… i’ll gonna really miss you! i know you’re going to do great things in heaven. man, just typing this made me cry… (Andrew H.)

Grace Yu I’m gonna miss you so much…thanks for your spirit led worship, your heart, and your friendship..we’ve had some pretty random, some pretty deep, and some really weird convos and I’ll always treasure those. I’ve always lo…ved your sense of humor…I mean who’s going to put in their away message that, “david has a dirty mind and needs to ask jesus for cleansing ” when I clearly see “UPASS” as UP ASS and not U PASS? Thanks for all the great memories..and hey. I can’t wait to see you Heaven again one day…maybe we can finally finish our Worship Practice, eh? ♥ (David L.)

I was just sharing some of our great memories with my roomate, and I have to say I remembered quite a few awesome ones. We always had fun in Spanish, and our La Catrina video was awesome!!! (though upon further reflection was kinda messed up, but i …don’t think we saw that is was because we were laughing too hard). And we had some awesome lunches senior year, with Wendy’s chili, yummm….. I’m so glad I knew you, you definitely brightened my life. I can’t believe I’ll never get the chance to visit you again. I was always amazed by your faith, and am glad you’ll be able to spend some quality time with the man in the sky! (Justine O.)

Grace i’m sorry that when we went off in our seperate ways for college we kinda lost contact. but u were one of my best friends in highschool and i still consider you to be even now. you were and are one of the most genuine friends anyone could …ever have wished for. you were always there for me in hard times and the 4 years of memories on the badminton team together i wouldnt trade for anything in the world. (Callie M.)

Grace, I never got to thank you for planting the seeds of faith in me way back in 7th grade. Thank you for telling me about Jesus, even when I didn’t want to hear it. Thank you for teaching me body worship, even if I was only doing the motions w…ith my hands, you knew and prayed that someday I would perform it in my heart. I truly believe that you were as influencial to my walk as any of the leaders I would have later on. I love your goofiness, your big smile, and bigger heart and I can’t wait to see you again. Til then, I’ll always remember you with gladness and praise. (Cat C.)

Now we have to wait even longer to finish that conversation, huh? I guess it can wait… See you on the other side. (Zachariah W.)

full of Grace…Yu…

so the last couple of days was……….crazy to say the least. Sunday I found out my sister is in the ER, then an hour later I find out that she had an hemorrhage, then a bit later I find out that she’s brain dead but still on life support. I then bought a ticket from KC to Chicago and flew out in the next hour.

Arriving at Chicago, everyone was so weighted down with grief but I felt the Lord somehow gave me supernatural hope that everything’s going to be ok. I had faith that Grace will be resurrected/revived, however you want to describe it…but as the hours passed by it became harder and harder to contend for healing and for life for Grace.

It’s strange, emotions, pain, losing a loved one. When you find yourself in such an intense situation you find yourself wondering, “am I supposed to be feeling or doing something right now?” But the “proper” way to act seems to simply escape your mind.

One thing’s for sure, it was so comforting being surrounded by friends that have gone through a lot with Grace and I. These people, our church friends have seen the best and the worst sides of both of us. Many of them camped out at the hospital for nearly three days. One of our friends flew in as soon as possible from New York. Three of our guy friends drove up from Urbana-Champaign.

Update more later, i’m pooped from the week. Thank you to those who tuned in via webstream or attended the memorial. You’ve all blessed my family so much! It’s so great to see how many lives Grace touched! Bless you all.

nearly there

i have a week and 5 days left before i make my way back to good ol’ KC. i meant to update more during my three months in Asia…but here I am, posting random none-sense Chinese nostalgic videos and making a fool of myself in China. But don’t worry, I did plenty of “serious” things too for the kingdom on top of enjoying God’s goodness during my stay here.

i’ve been out of the habit of blogging…probably because these few months with God putting my heart back together after a massive breaking left me feeling more than just a bit “overexposed?” So here’s my effort at returning back into the blogging world…

One of the many things the Lord has done throughout this trip is giving me closure. Throughout this year I’ve asked Him many times, “why was my heart broken? Why didn’t You prevent this from happening?” But miraculously, throughout this ministry trip, the story of how God allowed me to be broken and how Him healed me with His love has been the most impacting thing I’ve shared.

I’m SO grateful to Jesus for this year. Clinging to Him, crying out to Him night after night, coming to Him with the pain in my heart has birthed fruits of righteousness just as His word promised in Hebrews 12! God has brought me closer to the joy of His holiness. His goodness has been made so much more tangible to me.

I’ve met at least three girls and one guy whose hearts are broken over relationships and lost as to why this has happened to them. One time when one of the girls was sharing her story in a small group Alice and I were leading, Alice leaned over to me and whispered, “now you know why it happened.”

God is so good. Not only does He redeem us and heal us, He transforms us into a vessel of His truth and healing for His children. I love You Jesus! For healing me and helping me let go completely…..to hold Your hand.

I’m still so astounded by how God’s been revealing His Father’s heart to me through this incident. To know my Father in heaven has the BEST for me and will help me not settle for anything less than the best He desires to give me is the greatest gift. Even when I’m throwing a tantrum and arguing with Him about how He has it all wrong, He still fights for my heart to come into agreement with His. Abba, my Father in heaven, truly is my defender and protector.

God is so amazingly good….our hearts that are so accustomed to the ways of this world can’t fully comprehend or believe how good He is. Yet God opens our eyes, enlarges our capacity to enjoy and embrace His totally-other-than-ness. Praise the Lord! That’s why we want to worship God forever, because He is so so so good.

Missions Update

hi all, i’m currently at the half-way mark of my missions trip to Asia. I’ve spend six weeks in Hong Kong, teaching youths on intimacy with the Lord. Then I traveled to Beijing with Jiun, Jess and Alice. Now I’m in Taiwan, my homeland.

We’ve currently ministered at Rei-an church and ministered tonight at Torch to worship team members. God definitely is opening up opportunities to share the message of intimacy with many youth groups. Please pray for the Lord to pour out His Father’s heart toward all that we’re ministering to.

The Lord is so good, He has not only given me opportunity to minister to His precious children, but also He has been ministering to me throughout this entire trip. He’s touched my heart by answering questions I’ve asked this entire year. Thank you for your prayers and support.

album selling in Hong Kong

for all my friends in Hong Kong, if you’d like to purchase my album, “The Quieting,” please email me (sunnyhu7@gmail.com) and give me HK$100 before I leave on the 14th. My cds are taking a bit longer than I had anticipated to be put together in Taiwan so they probably won’t get here before I leave, sadness…yes much much sadness…but once i get to Taiwan I’ll send them to Hong Kong!

For samples of the album go to: www.myspace.com/sunnyhu

Chinese/Asian Church Dress code

wanted to share the lessons i’ve learned through previous ministry/missions trip mistakes so you don’t have to offend the churches in Asia as me and my teams have hehe. Most churches here will give you some grace if it’s your first time ministering here especially if you don’t speak Chinese fluently or if you’re Caucasian.

Here is the dress code if you want to be ministering in Asian churches in Asia:

1. bottoms: wear pants. jeans are acceptable. no shorts or skirts that reveal the legs, even if they’re “conservative” and cover your knees

2. tops: no spaghetti straps, wife beaters. tops should cover the shoulders and not be too low of course

3. shoes: covers your toes. yes i too wish i can wear flip flops, even “fancy” flip flops are not acceptable. ballet flats are acceptable just as long they cover your toes.

considering the weather here in Asia, especially in the summer, it’s a sacrifice but a very worth while sacrifice! : )

you know you’re in Hong Kong when…

1. you switch to a stronger solution (disinfectant) for your contact lenses cause they’re so dirty from the pollution
2. you can find dim sum anywhere for breakfast! and 7/11 sells DIMSUM!!!
3. You avoid shops on weekends cause it’s terribly packed
4. You use an “octopus” card to do almost everything
5. You sleep with the AC on at night
6. The TV reports how badly polluted the air is everyday
7. You’re quarantined for having a cold…or was it just me?
8. Some of the written Chinese doesn’t quite make sense
9. The bubble tea cups are a lot smaller than Taiwan
10. There are alchohol disenfectant gels in every public place
11. you can get around without knowing Chinese…almost everything is English accessible…

feel free to add your two cents…of how you know when you’re in Hong Kong

my songs are uploaded!!

check out the songs on my upcoming album, “The Quieting” on my myspace….whoot! finally found some time and a proper internet connection to upload them…
www.myspace.com/sunnyhu

May 09 Update

here’s my latest update:

please keep my team and I in your daily prayers. simply read through the prayer list once a day : ) we really need all the prayer coverage we can get. bless you.

Prayer Requests:
1. Grace to maintain the fasted lifestyle in Asia “being strengthened with all power . . . may have great endurance and patience” Col 1:11

2. Protection from the enemy “Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler, . . . And under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler. You shall not be afraid. . . A thousand may fall at your side, And ten thousand at your right hand; But it shall not come near you” Psalm 91:3-8

3. Firmly established in God’s love, not moved by man’s opinions “being rooted and grounded in love . . . that you may be filled with all the fullness of God” Eph 3:17-19

4. Anointed ministry with His presence, His heart, signs and wonders. “And it shall come to pass in the last days, says God, That I will pour out of My Spirit on all flesh” Acts 2:17

5. Team unity: “that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.” John 17:21

禱告事項：(請在您禱告中記念我們)
1. 在亞洲有恩典能維持禁食刻苦的生活: “照 他 榮 耀 的 權 能 ， 得 以 在 各 樣 的 力 上 加 力 ,好 叫 你 們 凡 事 歡 歡 喜 喜 的 忍 耐 寬 容” 歌 羅 西 書 1:11
2. 保護免受仇敵的攻擊: “他 必 救 你 脫 離 捕 鳥 人 的 網 羅 和 毒 害 的 瘟 疫 …你 要 投 靠 在 他 的 翅 膀 底 下 ； 他 的 誠 實 是 大 小 的 盾 牌 。你 必 不 怕 黑 夜 的 驚 駭 … 雖 有 千 人 仆 倒 在 你 旁 邊 ， 萬 人 仆 倒 在 你 右 邊 ， 這 災 卻 不 得 臨 近 你 ” 詩 篇 91:3-8
3. 緊緊紮根在神的愛中，不受人的意見而影響: “叫 你 們 的 愛 心 有 根 有 基 . . . 便 叫 神 一 切 所 充 滿 的 ， 充 滿 了 你 們” 以 弗 所 書 3:17-19
4. 藉由神的同在、心意、和神蹟奇事，帶下有恩膏的服事: “神 說 ： 在 末 後 的 日 子 ， 我 要 將 我 的 靈 澆 灌 凡 有 血 氣 的” 使 徒 行 傳 2:17
5. 團隊的合: “使 他 們 都 合 而 為 一 。 正 如 你 父 在 我 裡 面 ， 我 在 你 裡 面 ， 使 他 們 也 在 我 們 裡 面 ， 叫 世 人 可 以 信 你 差 了 我 來” 約 翰 福 音 17:21